 | #7056 panda
a panda goes into a restraunt, the waiter served him some bamboo. after the panda had eaten that he shot evey one in the restraunt and he leaves, the waiter comes running out and asked him what he don... |
| #5371 Answered Prayer
A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."
"What do they say?" the priest inquired.
"They o... |
| #4393 Frog princess
A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I,ll turn into a beautiful princess." He bend over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.
The frog... |
| #3799 panda
A panda walks into a bar has something to eat shoots every one in the resteraunt, and then leaves.
The waiter runs out after the panda and says "what did you do that for?"
he panda says "look m... |
| #3556 A German
England: A German "tourist," supposedly on a golf holiday, shows up at customs with his golf bag. While making idle chatter about golf, the customs official realizes that the tourist does not know wha... |
| #3320 Cat jokes 07
Q: How is a cat laying down like a coin?
A: Because he has his head on one side and his tail on the other!
Q: Why are cars longer in the evening than they are in the morning?
A: Because they,re l... |
| #3069 A contest and a bird
Very early one morning two birds are sitting at the side of a large puddle of oil. They see a worm on the other side. So ... the one flies over and the other one swims through-which one gets to the wo... |
| #2783 Worries about mad cow disease
There were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields.
The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit ... |
| #2782 Rules for Cats Who Have to Run a House
Compiled by Harold Reynolds and updated on December 6, 1994
Panda 1. Introduction
The following is a manual of guidelines for the busy cat(s) who will have a house to manage after adopting one o... |
| #2781 A guide to walking tigers
Tigers really are as big and poofy and soft as they look, and they purr like a freight train going by. You find this out by taking one for a walk. To take a tiger for a walk, you first need a tiger. T... |
| #2750 Law of Cat Inertia
Most diets fail because we are still thinking and eating like people. For those us who have never had any success dieting. Well now there is the new Miracle Cat Diet! This diet will also work on human... |
| #2749 Two angry neighbors
Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog.
So Bob then b... |
| #2748 Question and answer animal jokes 06
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Holes all over Australia.
Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
Q:... |
| #2747 Question and answer animal jokes 05
Q: What has four legs and an arm?
A: A happy pit bull.
Q: Why is a tree like a dog?
A: Because they both lose their bark when they die.
Q: Did you hear about the cowboy who got himself a dachs... |
| #2746 Question and answer animal jokes 04
Q: Diner: I can't eat this chicken. Call the manager.
A: Waiter: It's no use. He can't eat it either.
Q: Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?
A: The outside.
Q: What do you get when ... |
